Keith and Amy's Baby Brown

Ryan the Lion

2009-10-31T21:34:00.002-05:00

Halloween was tons of fun. Ryan seemed very comfy in his warm fleece costume that my friend Melissa so graciously let us borrow. Can't beat hand-me-downs when it comes to something your child will only wear once! We selectively trick-or-treated at friends and families houses around town and Ry was so cute I wanted to eat him up! I think by the day's end he was pretty worn out!

Doesn't he look ferocious??

First Birthday Bash

2009-10-26T20:30:00.003-05:00

The Birthday Boy!

The invitation and birthday cake

Smash cake!

Ryan was very dainty with his cake. He was tentative at first, then once he realized what it tasted like, got into it...kind of

With Grandpa Dhein

Birthday mayhem in the playroom!

From Baby....

2009-10-19T19:02:00.003-05:00

...to little boy!

Today we took Ryan to get his first haircut. I think we could have waited longer, but the back was getting so long that he was growing a mullet. Besides, Grandma and Grandpa Brown were in town, so I thought it would be good to do it while they were still here. He was a very good little boy, and he got to sit in the cool car and even hold a fake cell phone! And yes, he lost his baby curls but I am hoping some more will grow back! Here are some more photos from the haircut...
"excuse me...can you take a little more off of the sides?!"

Ryan was not sure what to look at...the car he is sitting in, the woman behind him holding scissors next to his head, or the baby Einstein video playing in front of him...sensory overload!!!

I also have tons of photos from Ryan's first birthday party which was a blast. For some reason when I tried to download them yesterday, I couldn't do it. I will try again soon...stay tuned!

Happy Birthday, Lubbins!

2009-10-15T20:40:00.001-05:00

I absolutely cannot believe that it has been almost one year since Keith and I were blessed with our beautiful boy. In fact, it is nearly impossible to believe. What a year it has been. I had no idea how much Ryan would change my life. Everyone tells you "a baby changes everything", but until that baby crosses the threshold of your home, you can't possibly fathom HOW.

I vividly remember the night Ry was born. The first time I laid eyes on him...well, they fill up with tears just thinking about it. The entire world paused for a moment. I thought he was absolutely perfect and could not believe that this day had finally come. I had this inexplicable feeling when I saw him, like I recognized him even though I had never seen him before. And he looked at me exactly the same way. When I held him he stared at me so intensely as though he knew that I was his mother. I was finally a part of this "club", this magical, wonderful, exhausting, emotional and rewarding club called Motherhood, a club I wasn't sure I would ever be granted a membership to.

What I remember the most about our first days at home with Ryan are the times when I would hold him and he would just stare at me. When he would wake up in my arms, and those little dark blue eyes would squint as he tried to focus on me, and I felt this overwhelming need to protect him for the rest of his life. Then my head would fill with thoughts such as, "he is going to grow up too fast!", "someday he is going to leave me!", and even,"God help the person that ever tries to f*#k with him, they will have hell to pay!"!!! Total Mama Bear. And then I would see a school bus driving down the street and shed a tear for the day that he would be old enough to ride that school bus.

I think I have reached a balance since then. Yes, I will struggle with the fact that Ryan is not a baby anymore, but I am excited for what is next. Soon he will be walking, and talking, and running, and learning all kinds of new, exciting things. He is a mellow kid who loves to observe, with an eagerness for new things. When we drop him off at school he immediately starts to play, and is like "Mom who?" when I leave. As hard as it was for me to adjust to going back to work, I love that he can be content without me.

On the flip side of that, I really love and cherish our alone time together. I love kissing those chubby cheeks and twirling him around while singing made up songs. One day he will be thoroughly embarrassed by my made up songs, but now they make him giggle. His giggle is permanently etched in my mind, the look of pure joy he has while unknowingly displaying the cutest gap between his two front teeth. Some of my favorite names for him are Lubbins (a Buck Wheat version of Lovins), Boopsy-Loo (i think our days are numbered with that one), Apple Dumplin', and Stinka/Stink-a-Link. I am sure once he starts to get a better command of the english language he will not approve of any of these names!!

Happy first birthday, Lubbins! No matter how old you are, you will always be my baby.

Fall Festivus

2009-10-14T20:26:00.002-05:00

Last weekend some friends invited us to their cabin in New Buffalo, Michigan. We had a great time doing all of the fun fall activities like apple picking and pumpkin patching. The weather was a bit nippy, but we still managed to have fun. Ryan loves a new adventure and he enjoyed taking it all in.

Ryan did not like the scary black kitty!

He was much happier in the safety of his stroller...

So much for a family photo!

My Boys

2009-10-09T21:13:00.002-05:00

Look at this darling photo of Keith and Ryan. Keith wanted a picture of Ryan with his little CU hat on during our photo shoot. Ryan kept taking it off the second Keith would put it on his head, so we assumed that Sarah wouldn't get a good shot. But I think she captured a terrific father/son moment here. It really illustrates how Keith takes everything in stride, even when they don't go the way he imagines. This is one of the million reasons why I married him.

This post coincides perfectly with Keith's birthday, which is tomorrow. Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband!

Ryan's Gift To Me

2009-10-04T16:13:00.003-05:00

On Saturday morning Ryan gave me the best gift. He woke up early, around 6am, and was struggling to get back to sleep. Tossing and turning and occasionally fussing. I decided to leave him be, but by 6:30 he was outright crying. Ready to get up, I thought. So I went in to get him. On weekends I always volunteer to get Ry in the morning even though Keith often offers to get him so that I can sleep in. I take every opportunity I can to see that smiling face in his crib on weekends because on many weekdays I am out the door before he even wakes up. Anyway, it is about 6:30 on Saturday and I pick him up, and he is clearly still so tired. I thought to myself, this will never fly, but I am going to try to rock him a bit so that he can slowly wake up before I change his diaper and dress him. Low and behold, he was a little dish rag in my arms. No squirming and trying to break free, no reaching for his books on the bookshelf, just resting his head on my shoulder, cuddling Robbie and trying to catch some more zzzzzzz's. It was heaven on earth. Completely unexpected. He actually slept until 8:15 cuddling with me on the rocking chair. I can't even remember the last time he slept in my arms. It was priceless, and not something that I take for granted. Love to feel like my baby still needs me like that!

Moving On

2009-10-04T15:04:00.003-05:00

Today I started packing up some of the toys that Ry has outgrown. In going through his toy chest, I realized that so many of them are way too baby-ish now. Mostly rattles and little stuffed animals that vibrate or make noise in some way; these things used to keep him endlessly entertained and now he just passes over them. Now that he is on the go he really likes balls and plastic or wooden toys that he can chuck and chase (that will make lots of noise when hitting the wood floor). We also have a little wooden step stool with his name carved into puzzle pieces on the top of it, and he loves to take the letters out and try to get them back in (or chuck them across the room). He has reached the next phase of baby toys and I have very mixed emotions about it. Yes, it is good that he is growing and developing and moving on, but is it not a mother's right to feel sad that her baby is growing up? More on that later. For now those toys will be in storage for the next little one in the family...
Which will be Ryan's cousin, the little Baby Dhein!!! Yes, my sister-in-law Teri is pregnant!!! We are so incredibly excited for she and my brother Jeremy. S/he will be their first, due at the end of March. YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

My Buddy

2009-09-29T20:31:00.002-05:00

Ry has been very into Charlie lately. He has been grabbing at his mouth and paws and giggling like crazy. Charlie doesn't mind, he always takes it in stride, unless there is a ball involved. Yesterday Ry was playing on the kitchen floor with a rubber ball and Charlie took it as a cue to play. He would grab the ball out of Ry's hands which Ry actually thought was quite funny. The only problem is that Charlie really does think it is a game and gets a little rough. He wouldn't ever intentionally hurt Ry, but when he is playing he does not understand limits! The final straw was when Ry was sitting on the kitchen floor with the ball and Charlie knocked him over to get it. It really didn't seem to phase Ry, but until he gets a little bigger, this is not okay! Ry doesn't seem to mind being separated as long as he can look at Charlie through the window.

Fave Pics

2009-09-28T20:45:00.003-05:00

I came across a few photos from earlier in the summer that are too cute not to post:

Ryan could not have been any more pleased sitting inside this box. A look of pure joy!

Favorite pasttime: looking down the stairs, wondering what he should throw down next, and then
throwing it down!

Too busy crawling to notice or care about the loss of his pants

The Dickens

2009-09-28T19:20:00.006-05:00

Ry is developing quite a little personality! It is usually cute...but sometimes not so much, hence his nickname "the dickens". He loves his bath when he can splash around and throw his bath toys. But post-bath is another story. He does not like to dry off and get dressed! The second I put him down he rolls over and starts grabbing at anything he can get his hands on, like this: I know that this is completely normal at this age; he is curious and does not want to sit still. But when I try to get him still enough to fasten his diaper and get him dressed, he fusses as though I am torturing him!

Something naughty that he really likes to do is throw his food on the floor. He is getting very selective about what he will eat (read: picky!). Right now his favorite foods are: yogurt, any fruit, cheese, pasta with marinara, mac and cheese, almost any cracker, and almost any baby food. There is not much else he will eat these days. We try new things almost daily and he will have none of it. I know that you can't force it. But when he won't even try something, then proceeds to throw it on the floor...it can be maddening. I get especially frustrated when I have spent time making something for him and it all ends up on the floor. I try to act cool with him since I feel like at this age, once he knows he will get a negative response it will only encourage him. So I try to approach it lightly while saying no and explaining how many children all over the world are starving (such a typical mom thing to say! But so true nonetheless...). He does still really like his baby food, which is many times what I resort to feeding him when he won't eat anything else...but I would like to get away from this since he is almost 1! Otherwise I resort to our staples of fruit, crackers or cheese slices which aren't the worst things in the world but he cannot live on them! I have heard from some people not to serve him anything special if he doesn't like what he is given...but I am sorry, I cannot let him go to bed without eating anything! Am I encouraging picky behavior??

Well anyway, it is hard to stay mad at him for any length of time, because then he looks at you like thisand all is forgotten!

Photo Shoot

2009-09-23T20:01:00.005-05:00

We had Ry's photos taken on Sunday and I absolutely love them! We were supposed to meet the photographer (Sarah) at a beautiful park near our house, and it started raining moments before our appointment! Major bummer. We had timed Ry's naps just right so that he would be perky for his pics, and I had him in his cute outfit which was spit up free, so when Sarah asked if we wanted to reschedule, I said NO! Let's just go for it somewhere indoors. We went to my parents house since ours still has, shall we say, several unfinished areas due to our drywall damage, and it worked out fine. Sarah suggested taking photos on the screened-in porch which enabled us to have tons of natural light. We did get a few outside when the rain stopped, but that coincided with Ry getting a bit squirmy...well, a lot squirmy!
But all in all I am thrilled with the photos...they are exactly what I wanted. See what you think! Click on the link below and click on the collection of "Ryan" photos.
http://sjbphotos.zenfolio.com

HAIR

2009-09-11T21:10:00.002-05:00

I am obsessed with Ryan's hair. I don't want him to ever lose these curls. I know someday he probably will, but I am going to hold off on any haircuts for quite a while. We are having photos taken next weekend and I want it to be a humid day so that his hair gets extra curly! It is the only time in my life that I have ever wished for humidity!

Ry and His Gals

2009-09-11T20:44:00.006-05:00

Ry had a lot of quality of time with the ladies on our trip also! Here he is being doted on and loved by some of my gal pals....

with Amy,

Kathleen,

Laura,

Sheila,

and Sharon!

These ladies are all good friends of mine...Out of the 5, I met 4 at the good ol' C&B, and each of them has given me so much more than they know! The fact that they love my boy makes them that much more special to me!

More Colorado

2009-09-10T20:36:00.006-05:00

Finally, miscellaneous pics of the trip. Ry really seemed to enjoy the travel and being in a new place. He just loves to look around and observe...people, places and things. We went for a walk one evening in the foothills near Red Rocks and there was a cool breeze blowing. Ry was in his stroller and as we walked he was smiling the entire time at the wonderful breeze caressing his hair. He was also reaching his hand out of the side of the stroller to touch the tall grasses on the side of the trail. It was incredibly sweet!

A nature lover already!

Play Time

2009-09-09T20:03:00.005-05:00

We had many play dates during our trip. It was pure joy to see Ryan meeting some other little people who belong to people that we love. Some of the travel started getting to Ryan after a few days...it seemed like he spent way more time in his car seat or stroller than he would have liked. However, when we arrived at our destination and started playing, he was a new boy. He is always on the move and is all about discovering new things. Here are photos of Ry and some of his new buddies:

With Emma and Nick. I grew up with their Mom, Terese

With Raina Bleu. Her Mom, Cathy Jo is a friend and long time co-worker at the C&B

With "little Jack Caldwell". I could not stop calling him by his cute full name when we met him! Keith grew up with Jack's Dad, Brian, and our little boys are only 2 months apart. They are sure to be partners in crime someday.

With Emme and Ava. Keith and their Dad, Jon are long time golfing buddies

With Jamison. Keith and his Dad, Pat, went to college together. Cutie pies!!!

We loved visiting with everyone and had a great time showing off our boy. We felt so welcomed and embraced by everyone and I know Ryan felt it too.
More Colorado pics coming soon!

Family Time

2009-09-09T19:45:00.003-05:00

Keith's parents, Bob and Berna, hosted a family party while we were in town to introduce Ryan to the Brown side of the family for the first time. Berna spent a lot of time preparing for it and it turned out to be such fun. Ryan got spoiled and was lavished with attention. He was such a good boy, especially considering that he missed his afternoon nap (which the nap nazi does not customarily let him do!!). Both of Berna's sisters were there with a couple of Keith's cousins and their kids. We had a great time catching up, since we hadn't seen most of them since our wedding 6 years ago!

The yummy cake...chocolate, chocolate, chocolate! Grandpa really wanted Ryan to have some, but Mommy was a wet blanket and said that he had to wait until his first birthday!

Cousin Lauren and Ryan. Lauren is 11 and was so helpful with watching, feeding and putting Ry to bed!

Cousin Mark and Ryan...instant buddies

Keith and Uncle Bob

The family...and much chaos!

So Much to Say

2009-09-08T19:53:00.004-05:00

Okay! I know it has been a long time since I have posted anything. We had some house issues and were staying with my parents. Then we were on vacation in Colorado, and it was fantastic. Our first big "family" vacation! I loved all the time I got to spend with my little guy (well, both of my guys!), and it was much needed! I have a lot to say about our trip which I will work on this week, but until then, a few pics....

Family portrait! It was so nice to be in Colorado again, and this time...with our little Sunshine!

Grandma Berna with HER Sunshine!

Lap time with Grandpa Bob

Ten Months

2009-08-22T14:12:00.006-05:00

Ryan turned 10 months last week, and a few days before that, became mobile. I don't think I would call it crawling yet, it is more the "wounded soldier" move and looks like this:
I can't believe how quickly he can get around!!

Before Ryan was born we received "Philadelphia Chickens" By Sandra Boynton as a gift. I had tucked it away for when Ry was older, but someone at work was raving about it yesterday so I decided to pull it out now. It is a book and CD; the music is super fun. Some instant favorites are "Snuggle Puppy", "I Like to Fuss", and "Belly Button".

Ry was completely enthralled in the book right from the get-go (even though this page doesn't appear to be particularly interesting...)

He would drag the book from place to place and turn the pages back and forth over and over.

And this is just plain cute!
Ry has teeth sprouting out all of the time it seems; he currently has 4 on the top and 4 on the bottom. He is also trying new foods daily. Some new favorites are mac n' cheese, sloppy joe's, and red pepper risotto. He absolutely loves sliced cheddar cheese too. Half of his meals are eaten and the other half ends up on the floor. Stinker!

More Play Time

2009-08-12T20:10:00.004-05:00

Last weekend we hung out with our friends Kara and Rob. They have 2 boys, Brendan, 6, and Sean, 2. I went to high school with Kara and we have been friends ever since. I have actually known her since junior high when we went to rival catholic schools and rode the bus together! Anyway....they hosted us for a summer BBQ and we had a great time. Ryan had fun watching the older boys run through the sprinkler and they also enjoyed playing with him on his beach blanket.
Brendan played so nice with Ryan; a very sweet "big kid"

Brendan, "Dr. Sean", and Ry

We are fairly certain that Ryan will play professional football someday

Another New Love

2009-08-12T20:05:00.005-05:00

I love my 'pasghetti!!!

I also love to wave whenever someone says my name!

Stuff

2009-08-07T19:44:00.005-05:00

Ugh! It has been so long since my last post...life has been a little crazy lately. I started at a new store this week and I am in over my head with newness and transitions. Not only am I starting at a new store which is an adjustment in and of itself, I have started a slightly different job as a "homestore" designer. I was previously focused only on the furniture portion of the business; in my new job I will oversee both housewares AND furniture. Yes, it sounds like double the work, and right now it feels like it too. It is a great opportunity for me, and if I am actually good at it, it will open up even more opportunities for me in the future. But right now it is downright overwhelming. After being back at work for 7 months, I realize that I like to work in addition to being a Mom. For me, it is a good balance. That is not to say that I always love it or don't ever complain about it. But at the end of the day, I do like the feeling of accomplishment that my job gives me in addition to my number one priority, which is my family. Anyway, I am struggling a little bit now as I am finding my balance with my new job. I know it will come. But like with any change in life, there will be some stumbling blocks before I get into the groove.

It seems like Ryan is changing so much with each passing week. He is SO close to crawling. He is getting tons of teeth. His little personality is developing so quickly as he experiences all of the new things that life has to offer...new foods, new faces, new activities. To say he brings Keith and I tons of joy is an understatement. Here a few recent photos...

Possibly his #1 new favorite food, nectarines (goldfish crackers and graham crackers are a close second)

His favorite toy...tupperware

Loves his books!

Hanging with our next door neighbor, Reese

"May I have this dance??"

Princess Reese dancing with her "Little Prince"...Ryan was fascinated by her dress and magic wand!!

Robbie and Me

2009-07-29T20:03:00.004-05:00

"If you live to be 100, I hope I live to be 100 minus 1 day, so I never have to live without you." ~Winnie the Pooh

Ready For a Swim

2009-07-27T19:52:00.002-05:00

Last weekend Keith, Ryan and I went to Lake Geneva with my parents for some R&R. We were all looking forward to a weekend away, and particularly excited to take Ryan on his first trip. It was a huge success! Ry was great; he was such a good boy and adjusted very well to his pack and play and new rental-condo surroundings. We've put him down in his pack and play on numerous occasions at friends houses, but never down for the night away from home. He slept right next to Keith and I, which of course I loved!!!!

Family photo before Ry's first swim. He is learning how to wave, and this photo captures the cuteness!

Ryan with Mom, Dad and Grandpa in the indoor pool...it rained on Friday...boo!

Ryan sitting pretty, waiting for his second opportunity for a swim

Yeah! Sun on Saturday and an outdoor swim. He never cracked a smile as he looked around and took it all in...

...and decided that swimming really wasn't as enticing as a nap was in the middle of the pool. My mellow little guy!

Our Megan

2009-07-26T21:11:00.005-05:00

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next." ~Gilda Radner

Megan will be so missed. I am still having a hard time believing that she is gone. In June, Megan was told that she was no longer a candidate for the bone marrow transplant. The cancer cells came back and she was too weak for the high dose chemo that she would have needed to prepare her body for such a massive undertaking. The goal was to do whatever they could to keep her alive and comfortable for as long as possible. By the end she was very weak, in extreme pain and so vastly different from the Megan that I remember. The last time I saw her was last Saturday, less than 24 hours before she passed away. That afternoon she had a febrile seizure and ended up in the hospital. She died peacefully the next morning, surrounded by her siblings and husband Tony.
Megan was such a character. She is known for her sense of humor and her ability to weave an ordinary story into something hilarious. She was always the life of the party, and the friend that you would call when you wanted validation after doing something indulgent. I met her in college, our first day of college as a matter of fact, and we have been the best of friends ever since. She grew up in Milwaukee and I in Downers Grove, and by the grace of God she married a guy from the western suburbs and ended up living in my hometown. For the past 2 and a half years we have lived just a couple of miles away from eachother, which has been an amazing gift.

Her legacy is her beautiful sons, Mason, 3, and Michael, 1. At the end she spoke of how painful it was to think of her boys growing up without their mother. This was certainly the most difficult part of her illness and at the same time, it was what gave her the incredible strength, courage and determination that she demonstrated every single day. She put up one heroic fight for those boys. They are lucky to have such an amazing father in Tony, who loved Megan unconditionally throughout her illness and never stopped believing in her ability to fight.

Megan and Tony

Megan and I in Lake Geneva

Doing what we did best at Ann's wedding

With our college roommates

Ann, Megan and I

I will never understand why Megan was taken from us so young, when she had such important roles in life as a mother, wife and friend. I can only honor her and her life, and help keep her memory alive for her family. Goodbye, Megan, until we meet again......

In Loving Memory

2009-07-21T20:59:00.009-05:00

Megan Kathleen Gentile
March 11,1974~July19,2009

We love you, Megan. You will always be our shining star. May you rest in eternal peace.

Nine Months Old

2009-07-16T20:09:00.005-05:00

This is right after his afternoon nap today. I love his messy hair~ he absolutely melts my heart.

He loves his "shapes" from his shapes sorter. They are like little rattles that fit perfectly into his hand. He never tires of them and when I start to sing, "shake, shake, shake"...(as in "Shake your Bootie"), he holds them up and shakes them like crazy while looking so proud of himself.

He is very into his teething biscuits. I think if Earth's Best saw him enjoying their product like this, they would want to use the photo in an ad campaign (but I am not biased). He looks like he is posing!

Classic...

2009-07-16T20:01:00.003-05:00

Why is the classic photo of the baby with a beer always good for a few laughs (at least to me)??? Here is Ry with our good friend Tim from Colorado. He will undoubtedly be the one to give Ryan his first taste of beer...if Uncle Jer doesn't beat him to it!
P.S. This photo was taken before the bout of illnesses...Ry is not mixing his antibiotics with alcohol...

Apparently,

2009-07-15T16:08:00.003-05:00

Ryan has saved up being sick for his first summer, when we should be out having fun and enjoying the weather. We brought him back to the doctor today because he just didn't seem to be getting better and will not take in enough liquids. The doc's diagnosis makes sense...he has an ear infection!!! The poor little guy. The hand, foot and mouth virus seems to be diminishing, luckily, but now he has an ear infection and 3 new teeth coming in to boot!! I probably wouldn't want to drink anything either, unless it was a frozen margarita!
We will start antibiotics tonight and hope for a speedy recovery!

Sickie

2009-07-12T20:01:00.002-05:00

It has been over a week since our last post, and not much has been going on because Ry has been sick all week. :(
He has the "hand foot and mouth" virus. I had never heard of it until last week. It is a virus that is common in babies when they have a low fever and can get blisters on their hands, feet and in their mouth. Yuck! Ry has no blisters on his hands or feet, but does have some on his throat. Consequently he is not eating nearly as much as he usually does, or taking in many fluids. Since it is a virus, it can't be treated with antibiotics, and I guess once you get it you aren't likely to get it again. It lasts 7-10 days and we are on day 7, so hopefully in a few days he will be right again. He is still pretty active, playing and smiling, but just isn't his normal self. He is, however, taking monster naps...there hasn't been a nap less than 2 hours all week! They are averaging between 2-3 hours. :)

Up until now, Ryan has really never been sick. He has had a couple of runny noses but overall, I think he inherited my strong immune system. Considering that he has been in day care 2 days per week since he was 3 months old I am amazed that he didn't catch anything sooner. Hopefully this will be it for the rest of the summer! I am glad he is getting it out of his system in time for our trip to Door County, WI next week!

My First Fourth of July

2009-07-04T20:39:00.003-05:00

At the parade, I watched intently as the noisy firetrucks rode by,

Daddy and I stood up when the war veterans marched by and we thought of Grandpa Bob,

I sat with Mommy and cousin Mads and waited for someone to throw candy my way,

Uncle Jer offered me my first Tootsie Roll,

And after a long day, Aunt Teri gave me a night cap.

Such a good day...I am one tuckered out little boy!

Splish Splash

2009-06-30T20:24:00.002-05:00

We finally got a new bath seat for Ryan. Until yesterday, We had still been bathing him in the infant bath. He was clearly getting too big for it, and now that he has been sitting up like a champ for so long, it was time to move on and start showing him the fun of a big boy bath.
The first bath wasn't so fun. He screamed the entire time. I didn't even wash his hair because I couldn't figure out how to tip his head back while he was crying so hard. In spite of that, I decided to give it another try again tonight. I figure he has got to get used to it eventually since it is here to stay...we are not going back to the infant bath!!! My friend "Cute Katie" was over and she gave me the courage that I needed to try it again. He cried at first but then got interested in what it was all about. "I get to play with toys in here??! There are even toys right here at my fingertips! I can sit up like a big boy AND get washed in this nice warm water??? Okay, I could get used to this!" And just like that he was quiet, curious, and completely fine with the new bath scenario. Whew!!!

Double Take

2009-06-30T20:14:00.002-05:00

Since this balloon says "Happy Birthday Mom", I think of my own Mom every time I see it. But really, it is my balloon, given to me by Ryan on my birthday last week. It is funny that when I see that, I don't associate it with me being a Mom, but with my own mother. Just proof that I am still adjusting to my new role, my fabulous new role, that I wouldn't trade for anything in the free world.
P.S....When I came home from work on my birthday, Ryan was sitting in the living room with a paper party hat on, holding this balloon. It may have been the cutest thing that I have ever seen. However, it was a long, virtually napless day at school, and meltdown was setting in. Therefore, no photos to share of the cuteness.

Play Time

2009-06-23T20:37:00.004-05:00

Handsome little lads- Ryan, 8 months and Mikey, 13 months

A kiss from Mason, 3 years

Busy boys!

I brought Ryan over to Megan's on Friday for some play time. Yes, Megan is home! Although she is still in therapy relearning basic tasks like getting dressed and walking, and is back and forth to the cancer center multiple times a week, she is home and enjoying her family. It was a great visit and made me so thankful that she is still with us. The boys were awfully busy and played so nice together. The world could have stopped and they would not have noticed!

Happy Father's Day!

2009-06-23T20:24:00.003-05:00

Happy Father's Day to Keith...the best Dad ever! (Besides my Dad, Gary, and my father-in-law Bob, of course!) I love this photo of Keith and Ryan. It looks like they are sharing a moment in time and it really tells a story. I changed the coloring to sepia and had it framed for Keith for father's day. It's even better in sepia, if I do say so myself!
A huge grin comes across Ryan's face whenever Keith walks in the room. It is very sweet. Even when Keith is just around the house doing stuff, Ryan studies him and it's almost as though he is already thinking...."I want to be just like him someday!". I am so grateful for my boys and know that Keith really treasures his alone time with Ryan, on Sundays when I am working and also during his weekday stint every other week.
Happy Father's Day, Keith, Dad and Bob!

New Tooth

2009-06-16T10:01:00.002-05:00

Ryan is cutting his third tooth. It is his upper lateral incisor (I know, so technical...not one of his front teeth, but the one next to it). From what I understand this is somewhat unusual, as it is typically one of the front teeth that comes in first. He does not seem to be bothered by it, but he has been grinding what little there is of it so far against his 2 bottom teeth. It is like nails on a chalkboard to me and I can't imagine it is very good for his brand new teeth. But how on earth would I get him to stop doing this? I guess I will have to wait for him to figure out that it will probably eventually hurt??? I can't wait to see this side tooth emerge...I think he will look awfully cute with no front teeth but one to the side. Keith thinks he will look like a hillbilly.

We are also trying some new foods. Now that he is sitting up so well we tried Cheerios. But he will have none of this textured foods thing! He makes a face and gags when anything with texture is given to him. Once he got so upset that all he wanted was his bottle. I don't want to traumatize the poor thing! Even mashed bananas are too chunky. Mashed avocados, same thing. He does like yogurt however, very smooth, chilled and sweet! :) This morning I pureed fresh asparagus that my parents brought back from Wisconsin last weekend. I tried to puree it as smooth as I could, but there is still some texture. We will see how it goes! I do think once he has some more teeth he will be more open to textured foods...I mean what kid doesn't like bananas and Cheerios??! Soon we will try cheeses, and after that, beans, tofu and eventually chicken and beef. Wish us luck!

Tid Bits

2009-06-10T20:47:00.005-05:00

Just some tid bits of what is going on in Ryan's life....
as you can see from this photo, he is sitting up unassisted these days. Depending on how tired he is, he can usually go a good 15 minutes or so before toppling over. He is also rolling all over the place, mostly in his crib. He is still not moving around a lot when playing on the floor, but he is starting to attempt getting up on his knees and perhaps figuring out how to crawl. In typical Ryan fashion, he is in no hurry to be the first baby on the block to do anything! :) He is just one laid back kid.

He is almost 8 months old and still loving his sleep. As a follow up to the question, how much does he love Robbie?, the answer is....A TON! We discovered this the hard way on Monday when he was at Grandma DeeDee's. We forgot to bring Robbie along but didn't think it would be a big deal. When he went down for his morning nap he was inconsolable upon realizing that Robbie wasn't there. DeeDee tried to give him a substitute lovey, but to no avail. He ended up falling asleep in her arms (which she hated, I am sure:))and Keith shuttled Robbie over for the remainder of the nap. All was well. Now we know not to forget Robbie, ever, and DeeDee even went out to buy another stuffed bunny~ the same exact one~ for such emergencies.

Just the other day Ryan started sleeping on his tummy. It is so cute! He is usually cuddling Robbie and when I go in to peek at him before bed he is looking like such a little boy. It is so hard to believe. Even tonight I discovered 2 new things that I have never seen him do. I was playing peek a boo with him after his bath. He had the hoodie part of his bath towel over his head and he pulled it over his eyes. Then he would pull it up as I yelled BOO! He would again pull it over his eyes and then pull it up, with me yelling BOO right on cue...he did this a few times as I wondered, could he really be understanding peek a boo, or was that just a fluke? Who knows. After his bath, I gave him his bottle which is our routine right before he goes to bed. He finished his bottle, burped, and immediately started fussing. As he reached for his empty bottle on the nightstand, he was crying, "Ba, ba, ba...!!!", which is our lingo for bottle. I think he was still hungry and wanting more ba! Was that his first word??? He was saying it so clearly in between sobs and it was obvious what he was referring to as he reached for it. The funny thing is that my parents watched him on Saturday and told us that after his bottle then he was doing the same thing. I just sort of dismissed it and thought it was probably a coincidence (sorry Mom and Dad!), but now that I have seen it with my own eyes, it is pretty incredible to see him make those connections. What a big boy!

Robbie

2009-06-02T20:45:00.005-05:00

This is a photo of Ryan with his new best buddy, Robbie. It is not the most recent photo, and I may have already posted it on a previous entry but I wanted to show a picture of them together for this posting. We decided to give Ry a friend, or "lovey" as some people call it, to have in his crib with him as a comfort and way to signal when it is time for bed. At first Ry seemed pretty indifferent to him, but recently I have noticed an attachment. When our little guy is tired and fussy is it pretty obvious; all he wants is to be placed in his crib. As soon as he sees Robbie, he is all smiles, reaches out for him, and instantly puts these two fingers in his mouth:
He knows it is time for bed and on the video monitor I can see him patting Robbie, playing with his ears, or just nuzzling his face in the fur. Too cute! I also noticed that Ryan was fussing last night around 2am. When I looked at the monitor he was reaching for Robbie and couldn't quite get to him. He continued to fuss until I went into his room and put his bunny back in his arms. Then he was fine!!!
For now we will keep Robbie in the crib for nap and bedtime only and see if Ryan continues to develop a strong attachment. At that point we can reevaluate where the relationship is going.....
As for where the name Robbie came from, I am not quite sure. Whenever I thought about him in my head I always called him that. Maybe because he is a rabbit...Robbie the Rabbit?? Not sure.

Newsflash:

2009-05-29T12:41:00.005-05:00

'nuff said!

Little Memories

2009-05-23T21:18:00.004-05:00

I can't believe it is Memorial Day weekend. I have wonderful memories of it from last year, because it was one year ago that I hit a milestone in my pregnancy with Ryan. It was Memorial Day Monday, and I had been working outside in the garden in the afternoon. It was hot out, I was almost 20 weeks along, and I was very thirsty, just as I had been for most of the pregnancy. I was sitting in the living room with a glass of ice water watching TV. The water was so refreshing and I was chugging it like crazy. All of a sudden I could see my belly rippling. I was holding the remote control that was resting on my belly and it was moving! I couldn't believe it!! It was very exciting and unmistakably Ryan moving around. I think he got quite a jolt from the ice cold water I was drinking.

Prior to that, I thought I might have felt him moving around but wasn't quite sure if that is truly what it was. This was the first time I KNEW it was him. Friends had told me that when it happened, I would know it. It was amazing! It was the first time that I really felt like there was a living thing inside me. And he has not stopped moving since!!! :)

The Next John Elway?

2009-05-18T21:16:00.002-05:00

Some of My New Skills

2009-05-13T19:28:00.004-05:00

Crawling over Daddy,

Using a spoon all by myself,

...and sitting up strong with a little help from my friends!

Seriously...time is going by at such a rapid pace! In a few days Ry will be 7 months old. It seems like we just passed the 6 month milestone. He is cutting a second tooth, so now he has 2 coming in on the bottom. Soon we will be documenting them with photos, but now they are both still too small to see in a picture!

The Arboretum

2009-05-10T19:41:00.003-05:00

On Saturday we went to the Arboretum. The weather wasn't the greatest but we wanted to get out and do something fun for Mother's Day weekend since I had to work today. It was so fun to show Ryan all of the trees and he was really taking it all in. I think he had a good time and he was such a good boy!

My first Mother's Day was awesome! As I said we celebrated yesterday and I felt so loved and appreciated! I got the best gift...Keith arranged for a cleaning lady to come over for a thorough cleaning once a month. I so love this gift...it is basically the gift of time which equals more time with my boys. Thank you, Keith! Ryan went out and got me a fragrance that I have been admiring since my trip to NYC a year and a half ago called Tocca~Florence. It is lovely! Ry's first trip to Sephora...:) Our trip to the arb was perfect because we were all together. Later in the day we went home and Keith cooked a wonderful meal for the family~ my parents, Uncle Jer (Aunt Teri is out of town) and myself. From appetizer to dessert, he took care of it all and even did the CLEAN UP! Wow! I am a lucky girl.

We would like to give a big shout out to our Moms.....Donna and Berna! Happy Mother's Day! We love you and appreciate all that you do :)

My Hero

2009-05-06T21:10:00.008-05:00

This is a photo of one of my dearest friends, Megan. As many of you know, Megan was diagnosed with leukemia almost a year ago. She has been on my mind constantly over the past month or so for a variety of reasons. She is on my mind especially today because it is her son Michael's first birthday and also because it is Mother's day week.

The past month has been particularly challenging for Megan and her family. I will try to give the short version. About six weeks ago, Megan was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. Since she has no immune system, even in the hospital on strong antibiotics and steroids she was unable to fight the infection and fever. She had too much difficulty breathing on her own and was put on a breathing tube as a temporary solution until she could get strong enough to breathe on her own. Since the breathing tube is so agitating, she was also sedated to help her tolerate it. Days, then weeks went by with little improvement. Her fever was not breaking, she was too weak to fight pneumonia or breathe on her own, and meanwhile she is "sleeping", unable to communicate with family and friends...most notably and tragically, her children, ages 3 and now 1.

We were all on pins and needles waiting to hear when she would gain strength and start to recover. Days passed~ Easter, Mason's third birthday, Mikey's first steps..the days slowly went by without Megan even knowing. I will never forget the Wednesday, two weeks ago today, that I heard unbelievable news from Megan's family. For a variety of reasons, the doctors didn't think Megan had more than a couple of days to live. They recommended that her family and closest friends come to the hospital right away~ and we all did. We filled up the waiting rooms and declared the day "Rally Day". Nobody likes a rally more than Megan. As much as we were saying goodbye to a beautiful friend, mother, wife, daughter, and sister, we were also holding on to the miracle, any thread of hope that Megan might pull through. Her husband Tony spoke as though that was the only option. I have never had the heartwrenching experience of saying goodbye to friend like that before. It was sad and scary. She did not look even remotely like the Megan that I knew. She looked like a stranger. I had to look at the collage of family photos that wallpapered her hospital room to remember what the old Megan looked like. And since she was so heavily sedated, she had no idea any of us were even there. Or did she?

As fate would have it, Megan did start making small improvements. Very shortly after Rally Day, her fever broke. Her liver and kidneys started functioning again. She started taking baby steps and making improvements that shocked even her doctors. In short, she is still alive!!!!!! That in and of itself is a miracle! She is still sedated and on breathing tubes but she is alive and getting better! Obviously there is a long road ahead of her. This week they hope to remove the breathing tubes. they will evaluate her from there. Another huge ray of hope is that she is still on the donor list for her bone marrow transplant. So this is still a possibility for her future and is ultimately what will get her healthy and hopefully cancer free forever.

I think of Megan all the time. I think about what we will tell her when she wakes up. I think about how hard she is fighting for her life and I know that it is all for Tony and her boys, her babies. She loves life. There is no way that she is ready to let it go. I think about how she will feel when she realizes that over a month has gone by and she has been asleep the entire time. It is sad, and yet she still has her life. I often wonder why this is happening to her, and not me, or anyone else that I know. Why did God pick her? When I want to complain about my own life, like how I don't get to spend as much time as i would like with Ryan, i think about her, and how she missed Mason's third and Michael's first birthdays. She missed Michael's first steps and who knows how many other milestones. It makes me incredibly sad. But she is alive and there is a lot of hope, which is cause for celebration. I don't think i will ever figure any of this out but i do know that she has been given a second chance.

Happy Mother's Day to one hell of a strong Mom. If I can be half as strong in life as Megan I will consider myself lucky. I look forward to the day when I can tell her that in person.

The Two Reasons Why

2009-05-04T20:14:00.003-05:00

...I consider myself so lucky!!!! Look at this handsome twosome!!!

Ryan is cutting his first tooth...basically as I write this. A couple of days ago my mom and I could see that there was finally a tooth about to emerge. Tonight Ryan woke up around 8:30 screaming, which is very unusual. I felt his gums and sure enough, I can feel a sharp tooth coming through. I was talking to our neighbor (mom of Reese, 2 yrs) earlier this evening and she said once the tooth pushes through, the hardest part is over, even if it has a ways to go before it is all the way in. So hopefully tonight will be the hardest part. He actually just fell asleep again, but earlier he was completely inconsolable. We have some of his rubber teething toys in the freezer which will come in handy later tonight if he needs some comforting. Poor thing!!!

Sitting Up

2009-04-28T21:01:00.008-05:00

I am a big boy!

Here I go!

And...gone!

We have been working with Ryan on sitting up. Much like his rolling over, he seems to have no interest in doing it on his own. He spends a fair amount of time in his exersaucer and jumparoo (have no idea what it's actually called, this is my name for it, it's the thing you hang above a doorway with a spring so the baby can jump around). He also spends time in his Bumbo chair which he is doing much better in, and now more than ever, he is logging in serious time on his tummy. But when it comes to sitting up, he still needs a lot of assistance. Our pediatrician felt that Ryan was completely on track with his milestones, but when I look at other babies, I see many who can sit up unassisted at a much earlier age. My Mom keeps saying, let's face it...he is held a lot, coddled and fussed over constantly...why would he want to do anything on his own??! It's true. It is time for tough love! Ha ha, that is a joke, but we do need to work him out a bit I think. I know he will sit on his own eventually, just as he will do everything else eventually...when he is ready.
And as I have said in an earlier post, I also think much of it is his personality. He is a very easy going baby and usually content doing whatever. So perhaps he will need some gentle nudges along the way. In the meantime I think I could learn a thing or two from little Ry guy about being content with where you're at in the present moment...

Growing Up

2009-04-27T20:42:00.004-05:00

Ry and I had a photo shoot the other day. Upon reviewing the photos, I started realizing how much he is starting to look like a little boy. I never notice this in the every day; it is only by looking at and comparing photos that makes me take notice. I can't believe how much he has changed in 6 months!

A Day Like Summer

2009-04-24T20:05:00.004-05:00

It definitely turned out to be a beautiful day. It was hot out! What happened to 70 degree days?! Well, I don't want to complain, we were able to enjoy the great outdoors and that is always better than sitting inside. We did go to the arboretum but never got out of the car. After waiting 15 minutes in a line of cars to get in, upon entering we found out that there was only shuttle parking and barely any at that. So we drove out and told Ryan that he would have to wait a little longer for his first experience at the arb. He seemed okay with it. We live only 10 minutes away and figured a stroller ride is a stroller ride to Ry at this point. Instead we walked around my parent's neighborhood and ended up running into Sarah, Madeline and JT (Sarah's parents live down the block!) and stopping to talk to other various neighbors along the way. Ryan loved the attention and was quite smiley for everyone!
He had his 6 month appointment on Monday and it went well. His height is 28 inches and weight is 18lbs 13oz (90th and 75th percentile, respectively). He is long and lean! We seem to be on track with all of his milestones. However, he has rolled over, as I have mentioned, but still not regularly. I know he is very strong because when I try to roll him back to tummy he really resists- big time! (he has currently only rolled tummy to back.) I don't know if it just doesn't come naturally to him yet, or if he is just so mellow that he could take or leave rolling over. When we put a toy just out of his reach he looks at it and tries to reach it briefly, but then usually just moves on to something else. Many times when he is on his tummy and he has pushed up a couple of times, he just lays his head down to the side and is very content doing just that (and I must admit, it is very cute. He just lays there as happy as can be, usually smiling and babbling away). He is so easy going that sometimes I think he is very happy just going for the path of least resistance. The mellow-ness he gets from his Daddy; going for the path of least resistance he gets from me! We'll see what the future holds for Ry and his rolling; until then, there is much laundry to fold....

Storytime with Gram

2009-04-24T11:38:00.003-05:00

Keith was out of town this week and my Mom offered to come over for a slumber party last night. It works out to be such fun because my Mom and I stay up to talk and drink wine in the evening, and in the morning she is here to play with Ryan before he goes down for his first nap.
Here they are reading together this morning. It is supposed to be 82 degrees today so after lunch we will all head over to the arboretum for some fun with mother nature. More to come....

Signs of Spring

2009-04-18T19:36:00.003-05:00

I have to post this photo of our Magnolia tree. It is having a great spring so far, unlike the past couple. Usually we get snow or a freeze right after it just starts to bloom, killing off the new buds and any chance of it reaching full bloom. After a long and very cold winter, I am thrilled that we got a chance to see this young tree in all of it's glory.
I wish I was more of a photographer...one of my new goals. A better camera and an eye for more artistic angles. Although I did take this one while holding Ryan....

Weekend Bliss

2009-04-18T18:50:00.004-05:00

It is Saturday night, I just put Ryan to bed, there is a wonderful breeze coming in the window (yes, the windows are open! Hooray for spring) and I am settling in for a quiet night at home. Keith went to the Cubs game with some friends and the house is completely silent. I don't even have the TV turned on; I am just appreciating the quiet and occasional sound of a bird chirping.

My "weekend" is drawing to a close, as my work week begins on Sundays now. I am off on Friday and Saturday and I must say that I have really come to enjoy it this way. On Friday it was 72 degrees and sunny. Truly, a perfect day. I thought of many things that I could do with Ryan, going here or there, but opted to just stay home and take him for a nice long walk to the park in town near our house. Just Ryan and I. Keith was golfing or else he surely would have joined us with Scout and Charlie. At the park I put Ryan in the baby swing, not sure how it would go over (or if Ry would quite literally "go over"), and it was a huge hit! He loved being in the swing, just hanging out. He sat in it as I pushed him for several minutes, looking at all of the newness around him, and every few minutes he would start giggling out of the blue. It was the sweetest thing and made me giggle quite a bit as well. Those are the small moments that fill me up as I wind down the weekend and start my work week.

Photo Madness

2009-04-14T21:10:00.002-05:00

I am experimenting with slideshows on the blog. I currently have 2 of the same ones posted in different locations until I figure out what I want to do where. In the meantime, enjoy!

Six Months!

2009-04-14T19:46:00.005-05:00

Ryan is days away from being six months old and I can hardly believe it. He is growing up so fast, and it is only by looking at photos that I realize how much he has changed since he was born.
Keith and I have been so blessed with such a happy and healthy boy. It is amazing how curious he has become about everything. We have entered a whole new phase! Ryan loves reaching out for things that he is interested in, particularly faces, clothing and jewelry! I have noticed this mostly when I am trying to put him to bed. Even if he is tired, he will start grabbing my face, earrings or scarf and then smile as if he wants to play. I can no longer rock him to sleep unless he is extremely tired because he just squirms and reaches out for interesting things. Which leads to my next topic, a favorite one....sleep!!!
It is a small miracle, but Ryan is sleeping through the night with zero interruptions. He is no longer swaddled. In fact, we put him to sleep in just his sleep sack with BOTH ARMS FREE!!! And he goes to sleep! And doesn't wake up in the middle of the night needing to be comforted or repositioned or anything! It is such a gift to know that he can soothe himself back to sleep when he wakes up in the middle of the night. He goes to bed at 6 or 6:30 and sleeps until about 6:15 am. We had been putting him down "drowsy but awake" for naps starting about 4 weeks ago, and he learned how to fall asleep on his own. About 2 weeks ago, we started putting him down awake at bedtime and usually within 15 minutes he is asleep. It is a beautiful thing. Of course there are nights here and there that he wakes up and needs us and I must admit that I do like feeling needed once in a while!
I can't wait to see how much he weighs and how much he has grown at our doctor's appointment next week. He is eating cereal and veggies right now and will start with fruit this weekend. He is still rolling over sporadically and is starting the "sniper crawl" when on his tummy. One of his favorite activities is to sit on a lap and look at a book. He likes the small cardboard books and will stare at the pictures and turn the pages back and forth for several minutes at a time...well beyond the length of time that his attention span typically lasts. Bookworm??? Hmmm.....

Weekend photos

2009-04-13T20:56:00.006-05:00

Here are some photos from the weekend. Grandma and Grandpa Brown were in town and Ryan got much attention and love. We had a lot of fun having the whole family together!

Go Broncos

2009-04-07T15:31:00.004-05:00

Look at this big boy on his Broncos blanket! I can never resist a photo of Ryan wearing just a onesie!

Growing up

2009-03-28T11:28:00.003-05:00

Ryan is now strong enough to play in his exer-saucer! Yesterday was his first experience in it and he was truly enthralled. What a big boy!

Right now I am watching him on the video monitor sleeping like an angel...with both arms free! This is huge for him- no more swaddle! It took a while to get him down for this nap. He fussed and tossed for 45 minutes but has now been down for 2+ hours and counting. For naps we are putting him down awake so he can learn to fall asleep on his own. It is not always easy for him because he isn't always sure what to do with his busy arms!! But we are making progress each day. Of course as I write this, he awakens! He is saving you from having to read any more about his adventures in sleep. Lucky you!

The Artist

2009-03-28T11:09:00.004-05:00

I had to post some photos of Ryan's "artwork". At school they are always keeping the little ones busy and love to make keepsakes for mommy and daddy using the baby's hand and footprints. Check out the Valentine's bouquet and penquin that Ry "made"! I melted the first time I saw these; they will be saved forever. They are currently working on "look how I've grown". They take the baby's footprints, post them in the infant room, and 2 months later, take them again so we can see how much Ry has grown in 2 months time!

Spoiled

2009-03-22T19:10:00.006-05:00

Some photos from the weekend...Ry with Aunt Terese, Madeline, Grandma and Grandpa. My title "Spoiled" was referring to Keith and I as you will read about in this entry, but I guess the same word describes Ryan when you look at these photos of him with the people that love him so much!

As with many things in life, you don't know how good you have it until that good thing is gone. I knew that we had a good sleeper on our hands and several times I did acknowlege how lucky we were. We still are. But our good sleeper has been a little off over the last few weeks and we are trying to adapt as quickly as we can to keep the good streak going.

Usually we can just put Ryan to bed between 6 and 7 after the bedtime routine, shut the door and not hear from him until well after we go to bed. He would go right down no problems, and be down for many hours before we heard a peep. A few weeks ago, we put him down and 10 minutes later he was awake and crying. A fluke, I thought. We soothed him and he went back down fairly quickly; he was clearly very tired. Then again, maybe 30 minutes later, he was awake and crying. We decided to give him a few minutes but it only became worse. Up until this point we never had to grapple with the decision of whether or not we would let him cry until he fell back asleep or go into his room to soothe him. After about 2 minutes we both agreed to go in and soothe him! It is the hardest thing to hear your baby cry and ignore it. And he wasn't just fussing; I have let him do that for a while in the past, he was crying pretty hard...and that I just can't bear. So he went back down, and this continued a few more times. He would wake up crying and we would intervene. We hoped it would be isolated. That evening we had friends over, and although he had gone to bed on time, we thought he was a little wound up or just wanted to be up with us socializing. But no! It happened again and again for the next few nights. It stopped for a few days but then started up again. Add in daylight savings and things were getting a little off kilter. My friend Sarah, who has 3 children who are now all great sleepers, suggested that we change his bedtime to 30 minutes earlier, perhaps he was overtired, thus causing the frequent night wakings. We did that, and it definitely seems to be helping. Now he goes to bed between 6 and 6:30! A definite reminder that babies are constantly growing and changing, and we are all constantly adapting.

Last night he went down just fine but woke at 4am. He started fussing and chattering to himself which is normal up to a point, maybe 30 minutes max. But after 30 minutes he kept going, and then 60 minutes, an hour and a half....during this time i had gone in and reswaddled, soothed, picked him up and rocked back to sleep, you name it. As soon as I would put him down or leave the room, he would fuss again. I finally picked him up at 6:15 and held him while he slept until 7:15. That is never really a problem because I just hold him and stare at him while he sleeps, thinking about how he will be too big to do that before I know it. I actually really treasure that time, but I must admit, I am exhausted tonight from being awake since 4:00! I realize now how spoiled I am because many parents feel this tired every night! Even with our sleep "woes", we still get a pretty good nights sleep. I give those exhausted parents a lot of credit for being able to function day to day. I would be a mess. Who knows what tonight might bring!

On another note, Ryan is making great progress with swaddling, or should I say lack of. We still swaddle him every night, but he has his hand to his mouth in no time flat. He is now sleeping most of the night with one entire arm out of his swaddle which is huge for him. There is nothing that can keep him contained now, which is fine because all he really wants is that little hand to suck on.

He did roll over last week but has not done it since. I find that so interesting because I expected him to be rolling all over the room by now. I guess he will do it again when he is ready! He also tried his first veggie the other day, sweet potatoes, and seemed to thoroughly enjoy. Next stop: carrots!

Uncle Jer

2009-03-16T20:11:00.005-05:00

Uncle Jer fed Ry last night. What a natural! As you can see Ryan was pretty taken with Jer and his enthusiasm. He loves his godfather!

2009-03-09T20:30:00.004-05:00

The weather was actually nice last week and we had a couple of days of sun and short sleeves! I couldn't resist putting this hat on Ryan. It is embroidered with kites and fit him like a glove! (A tight one!) We went for an awesome walk~ Keith with the two dogs and me with the stroller. It was such a simple thing, but the most fun I have had in a long time!! Ry was asleep within minutes of leaving the driveway.

And more on the front of becoming a big boy....Ryan rolled over! He went from tummy to back, and has done it a few times so far. It takes a while for him to do it beginning to end, but he does it nonetheless. I am now looking at Ryan's growth as a runaway train...it seems like from here on out things are going to start happening so fast. He is almost 5 months old, eating cereal and is now rolling over!!! I can hardly believe it. I have to remember to cherish each day, we will never get this magical age back!

Joy

2009-03-06T09:29:00.002-06:00

Ryan is pure joy. That's all there is to it. This morning I had the distinct pleasure of going in to get him after a great night of sleep. He was all smiles of course, and we had a great morning of reading, singing and play. He seemed so happy for the couple hours he was awake~ engaged, giggly and so interested in the world around him. He is starting to get really into books, looking at the pictures and reaching out for the pages. I want time to stand still! He is such a great age now and I swear he is changing daily. He is slowly turning into a little boy. I know that it will only continue to get better, at least that is what I hear. I love my role as a mother and once again feel so lucky that I have been given this gift.

As a follow up to the swaddling story, we changed his swaddle because he grew out of the sleep sack. He is now in a stretchy cotton swaddle. I thought we were doomed since he can so easily work himself out of it, but I actually think it might be better. He works his hands up to his mouth (loves sucking on those fingers!) and his arms are bent but still pretty secure in the swaddle. I wish I would have thought of doing that a long time ago, this way his has his hands which is what he really wants but his arms aren't flailing. Lesson learned, another one for my new mom page! He slept great last night with only one intervention around midnight. The rest of the night he had his little hand close to his face but slept like an angel. He is such a dream come true!

Still Swaddled

2009-03-02T19:13:00.009-06:00

It's official. Ryan cannot sleep without being swaddled. He has been "sleeping through the night" for quite some time now...unless you factor in the number of times we go into his room to re-swaddle him. Sometimes it's once, sometimes it's three times. It's not a big deal, it only takes a second. But I keep wondering when he will grow out of it. He has a habit of incessantly scratching his head and rubbing his eyes when he is tired; that is the main cue that he is ready to sleep. But even though we trim his nails every other day, he inevitably ends up scratching his head and leaving marks. I wish he wouldn't do this and wonder when he will grow out of it; I hate to see all of those little scratches on his head! Anyway, when he breaks out of his swaddle during the night, he goes for the head scratching and usually can't put himself back down unless we reswaddle him. When we do, he is right back to sleep. No crying or shenanigans. I know that we are very fortunate to be getting as much sleep as we do with a 4 month old baby. I cannot complain about that. He is a dream sleeper as long as he is "contained"!! Great naps and 12-13 hours each night. But when will he be able to sleep without a swaddle??(he is outgrowing his favorite one!) It is a sleep sack with a removable velcro band that goes around his arms. We've tried the swaddle blankets, but they don't keep him swaddled for more than a couple of hours. We've tried sleepers with the built in mitts that go over his hands, but he still flails about and keeps himself awake doing so. The easiest thing is just keeping him swaddled as tightly as we can. I know that his nervous system is still developing which is causing him to have little control over his arms. I guess we will periodically try to wean him from it as he seems ready. A friend suggested trying to keep one arm in and one arm out one night for a gradual transition, but he just fussed when I was soothing him to sleep which is very unusual. Once I put both arms in the swaddle he was asleep in seconds! My big question is, will he just grow out of this or will he have to "learn" how to soothe himself with his arms free? So many parents that I talk to said their babies just transitioned without any issues; like they could take it or leave it. But we rely on it! If anyone has any good advice or info, please share!

A Colorado Boy at Heart!

2009-02-26T15:11:00.002-06:00

Ryan looks ready to tackle his first hike doesn't he???

Four Months Old!

2009-02-21T19:35:00.004-06:00

Ryan's 4 month appointment was last Monday. He weighed in at 15 lb 2 oz (50th percentile) and 26 inches long (90th percentile)...long and lean! He is outgrowing his clothes so quickly. We are lucky to get hand-me-downs from friends~I don't think we have purchased anything new for him ourselves. That is really nice, but about to change! I have noticed as my friend's boys get older, the hand-me-downs decrease...the clothes wear out before they can be handed down! That is okay, I have no problem shopping for my little guy. But anyway, I digress....Dr. Murphy gave us the go ahead to give Ry rice cereal. We started yesterday and he has taken to it like he has been eating off of a spoon forever! It has only been 2 days and he really seems to "get it". I have noticed recently that he doesn't seem to be satisfied with what we normally give him in his bottle; so he was definitely ready for something more! It is so much fun putting him in his chair and feeding him. I can't wait for him to try different foods to see what he likes and dislikes....I wonder if he will like the foods that I craved while pregnant. Or is that an old wives tale??

I now feel like we are in a routine during the week. As I have mentioned, I love routine. It makes me feel much more centered. During the week, I rarely interact with him in the morning since he is usually still asleep when I leave for work. After work, I run out the door at 4pm every day so that I can be home at 5 to be with him until his bedtime (between 6 and 7). It is not nearly enough time, let me tell you! But I live for my Fridays and Saturdays when I can be with him all day. We don't do much. I am selfish that way. I want to spend every second of my days off with him. I can't get enough of that baby!!! I hold him as much as I can, kiss him, cuddle him, and am completely in his face (if he has issues later on, we will know why!). So now it is Saturday night ( I know, this is what I am doing on Saturday night~ but Keith is making me dinner, and later we will have a cut throat round of Scrabble. But again, I digress...) and I am dreading tomorrow, because it is my Monday. For the next 5 days, I will only see him a couple of hours each day. I don't want to sound like I am complaining; I am making peace with it. It is a choice that I made and I know that it was the right one for us even though it isn't always easy. So please allow me to post photos of me and Ryan wearing his "I Love Mommy" bib~ that is what gets me through the week!

Cute Katie

2009-02-17T19:31:00.004-06:00

We love Cute Katie!!! Katie is my friend from Crate who watches Ryan every other Tuesday. Yes, we call her "Cute Katie" (at work and at home!) every time we refer to her, and you can see why! I started working with her a little over a year ago when she moved here from Texas. She is a little spitfire; somewhat shy but has tons of energy and is one of the most easy going people that I have ever met. She helped me a great deal at work throughout my pregnancy, climbing up on the ladders and doing all of the fancy stunt work that we designers do day to day.

Anyway, I knew she loved kids and that she had done a lot of babysitting ("I love kids so much...I would babysit for free!"...) She even babysat for customers that she met in the store whose kids fell in love with her. I hit her up to see if she would be interested in a stint with Ry every other week and she was game! Since Keith has every other Tuesday off, Cute Katie fills in the alternate Tuesdays, and boom....one less day for Ryan at day care! This is what has enabled us to bring Ryan down to 2 days per week at day care and it works out well for everyone!

Most importantly, Ryan loves Katie. He giggles and squeals for her, and when I am holding him he is fixated on her and smiles like crazy. It is the cutest! They make quite a pair, don't you think?

Just Cute

2009-02-11T19:25:00.006-06:00

Nothing really exciting to report these days. We are in our routine and getting into our groove! The weeks are flying by and next week Ryan has his 4 month appointment at the pediatrician. We can't wait to see how much he weighs and how much he has grown. Keith and I both still want to go to each doctor's appointment. I wonder when that wears off.....I am sure when Dr. Murphy sees us, she is thinking, "oh no! it's them again!" :) We are okay with it. We are completely enamored with our boy!

The weather got nice for a few days and here is a picture of Ry with his "too cool for school" sunglasses on (from Grandma and Grandpa Brown). The spring weather cannot come soon enough.

I still can't believe it was just over a year a go that we found out I was pregnant. I could never have imagined how our lives would be so different (in the most wonderful way) a year later! Ryan has been such a gift, and I stand by my mantra always...the best is yet to come!

Dear Daddy,

2009-02-04T21:26:00.006-06:00

Here I am hanging out and relaxing before going to school. Don't I look cute? I really miss you! Mommy said you are in Colorado working and visiting Grandma and Grandpa. I hope you come home soon~ I miss seeing you at our 3am rondez-vous! Mommy is doing a great job flying solo this week, and I think you should buy her an expensive present to thank her. Maybe diamonds?????

When you come home I will show you my first "art project" that I made at school. I think I am ready for kindergarten! Love, Ryan

What is it

2009-02-01T13:38:00.003-06:00

about bath time photos that make them so irresistable???!

Sleeping Beauty

2009-01-31T12:53:00.004-06:00

I know that documenting Ryan's sleep schedule isn't really that exciting, but I just had to write about this because I am still in shock! So...yesterday I was thinking that Ryan was coming down with something, which now I know that he is not. He seems fine, his temp is fine, he does seem to have some "bats in the cave"- more than usual, but it really doesn't seem to be bothering him. Yesterday he took that long nap...it ended up being 3 hours and 15 minutes long. Then he took a 45 minute nap. An hour later he was rubbing his eyes and scratching his head (his new tired signal...and I mean, he SCRATCHES his head, causing tiny little cuts on his forehead that make him look a little neglected- even though we cut his nails all the time). So I put him back down at 4:45pm hoping for another 45 minute nap. Around 6:00pm I opened his door, turned the hall light on, turned off his rushing water white noise and waited for him to wake. He stirred, but kept falling back asleep. I didn't have the heart to wake him up, it just seemed so cruel. I just wanted to get one more bottle in him since he hadn't eaten since 3:00pm (not to mention put his pajamas on and change his diaper!). He never woke and we didn't push it. We went to bed and I woke up every hour or so, looking at the clock each time and each time was amazed at how late it was getting. Midnight, 2 am, 4am! 5am!!!!!!! Still out. He eventually woke up around 5:15 happy as can be and soaking wet from his diaper!!! I gave him a bottle and he went back down for another hour. I just can't believe that he can sleep that long and I guess there is no harm in him going to bed that early, but it just seems SO early and it would be nice for him to sleep in his pj's and on a full tummy! And it is not like he isn't sleeping during the day! So today we are trying to time his naps so that he can take his last nap earlier and be awake for the nice bed time routine that we have started. We will see- he just woke up from his second nap, another 45 minute one, and he looks awfully ready to go back down again....

Already?

2009-01-30T11:56:00.004-06:00

So, I know they say that babies who go to day care get sick more often than those who don't. I expected Ry to get his first cold at some point, but I didn't expect it to happen after his first couple of full days there! I might be jumping the gun, he is not really showing any major signs quite yet, but this morning I noticed that he had a little bit of congestion in his nose. About 30 minutes after he woke this morning (he slept until 8!) he became Captain Fussy and could not be soothed. His temperature is 99.9, which is getting close to the 100.4 temp when you are supposed to call the doctor. I took it again a second later and it was 100.1 (I think our thermometer is suspect though...it gives a reading after about 3 seconds...shouldn't it take a little longer??) I gave him his bottle at 9am and he went down for his nap at 9:30. It is noon and he is still out! So I think he might be fighting something. Let's hope this monster nap does him some good....

A Better Day

2009-01-28T19:42:00.003-06:00

So, as a follow up to last night....Ryan woke up at 9:45pm for a bottle and wanted to go back down right after! So down he went! I was happy to at least have a little time with him for that. He then slept until 5:15 this morning! He had his bottle around 6, then went down again from 6:30 to 7:30! He does love his sleep.
He went to day care today (which I think I am going to start calling "school"...a lot of my friends do that because it sounds better than "day care"! besides, he really is learning a lot there....). Anyway, Keith went to visit him at lunch today since it is just a mile away from home. Ry was napping and managed to take a 1 hr 45 minute nap in addition to his other 45 minute one. I am so relieved that he is sleeping well there. His "teachers" Chris and Laura say that he a very happy and well mannered baby when he is there. I was joking that they probably say that to every parent and my friends have assured me that they do not...if your baby cries or fusses a lot, they let you know! So of course I am also relieved to hear that he is adjusting to his new environment. I am sure that every day is not going to be sunshine and roses, but we are off to a good start.
After school he was tired so he took a 45 minute nap in my arms which I loved. We both got to relax after a long day! Then we played for a bit, listened to music, read, and wound down for the evening. He went down at 6:30 which is becoming his usual bed time. Hopefully he won't get too crazy with his swaddle tonight and will be able to sleep peacefully with minimal interventions!

Wah!

2009-01-27T19:54:00.006-06:00

I am sad tonight because Ryan went down for a nap today at 4:45pm and is still asleep at 8:00pm! He has done this before; his body clock must be telling him that it is time to go down for the night. He will surely wake up before midnight for a bottle since he hasn't eaten since 3:00 this afternoon. I am whiney because I spent zero time with him today! I did change his diaper this morning before work, but then had to hand him over to Keith to feed him since I had to leave. Wah! I am so sad that we had no quality time together today. Every day I race home from work in an effort to get my hour or two with him in. Keith keeps joking that with such an early bedtime, I will get plenty of time with him in the middle of the night tonight! We shall see. But right now I do feel a sort of emptiness, like something major is missing from my day. It just doesn't seem right! He must really need the sleep...growth spurt??

Transitions

2009-01-22T19:14:00.003-06:00

Ryan had another discovery day today at Chesterbrook. I took the day off of work so that I could go in with him and meet his "teachers" and spend a little time there with him. I am so glad that I did. I have been freaking out about daycare for the past couple of weeks. All along I thought I was okay with it but recently I have been panicking. I kept thinking that we made the wrong decision, why didn't we look for someone to come over to watch Ry instead of taking him to a day care. I was completely stressed and ready to pull a 180 and change the course of things completely.

Well, I am so glad that I had today to go in and check things out. I had certainly been to Chesterbrook before, a couple of times, and had even brought Ryan there before when he was less than 8 weeks old. Daycare still seemed so far away. I had met the principal and had much correspondence with her even before Ryan was born. But as the time got closer to him having to go there twice a week, well I started looking at it so differently.

I am always amazed at how mellow the infant room is. There are 7 babies there and you would think it would just be mayhem. But the teachers have everything so under control. And you wonder how any of the babies get any sleep, but they do! There were 3 babies in their cribs sleeping soundly. Ryan even slept today in his crib! There was certainly no power napping going on, but last week at his first discovery day he did not sleep at all. Today he took 2 naps, one 45 minute and one 30 minute. When we first got there I stayed for a while to play with Ry as he took in his surroundings. I put him on his tummy on the boppy pillow and he was completely content on it, using his core to lift himself up as he was mesmorized by all of the other babies playing. The teachers were all remarking how strong he was and good on his tummy. He was so distracted by the other kids that he didn't even realize he was on his tummy!! It was very satisfying to see him taking it all in and I really like that he is able to see something other than the 4 walls of our house a couple of days per week. I was there long enough to see a lot of parents picking up and dropping off their children of all different ages, a lot of siblings, and a sense of community where everyone seems to know eachother. The very best thing about today was that when I went to pick him up he was so happy to see me! He was all smiles which reassured me that he wasn't holding a grudge for "abandoning" him for a few hours (as though he would be capable...).

The teachers seem patient and attentive and I look forward to getting to know them better. For them it is all routine and they make it look so easy. I am sure they have their moments when every baby needs something, but each time I have been there every baby seems content. I really like the principal as well, and her 6 month old daughter is also in the infant program which I LOVE. If her daughter is there I know she is keeping close tabs on it! We are still making great efforts to keep Ryan from lying flat on the back of his head and I certainly hope they will do the same. That, in addition to all of the daycare germs are the things that I still worry about. But overall I am comfortable with our childcare decision. And nothing is permanent. If it ends up not working out for some reason in the long run, we have other options. Time will tell, but for now I can find something else to lose sleep over (there WILL be something....)

Mommy's Big Boy

2009-01-18T16:06:00.003-06:00

On a quest to look for fun things that would help us keep Ryan off of his head, Keith picked up this "Bumbo" chair. I thought that Ryan was way too young for it, but the box said 3-6 months so we gave it a shot. To my amazement, little Ry was able to sit up in it and actually hold himself up! It is too cute! After about 5 minutes he gets pretty tired and starts hunching, but what a big boy sitting in his own little seat! He really seemed to enjoy the independence and I think he even surprised himself!

Tummy time is coming along. He can do about 5 minutes flat on his tummy and almost 15 minutes propped on his small boppy. That might not seem like that long, but for someone who used to fuss immediately when placed on his tummy, it is an eternity! He is getting stronger every day!

Down for the count

2009-01-15T15:52:00.001-06:00

Today I am stuck in bed with the flu. I feel like crap and definitely haven't been this sick in several years. Usually I have a rock solid immune system. The worst I will ever get is a cold. But this flu has really taken me down! I guess the combination of going back to work along with recently having a baby has taken it's toll on my immune system. Right before I went back to work Keith told me to get a flu shot since I would be exposed to the general public and many more germs. I said I would but never did. I just kept thinking about how I never get sick, so why did I need it. Who knows if it would have made a difference, but now I wish I had gotten it just in case.

The worst part is that I can't go near Ryan! It is killing me. I was holding him last night when I thought I was just getting a cold. I pulled the scarf I was wearing over my mouth and nose to avoid getting him sick and used a ton of Purell on my hands. Today I don't want to go anywhere near him, because the thought of him feeling as bad as I do breaks my heart. I am in quarantine in our bedroom while Ry and Keith are going about a normal day. I can hear them and I want to run out and play! I heard Ryan crying and I wanted to rush out to see why. I already feel like I don't get enough time with him so this is very hard. Hopefully I will start feeling better soon and we can have a relatively normal weekend.

Right now Ryan and Keith are at "discovery days" at Chesterbrook (our daycare). It is Ryan's first time there, and Keith is staying with him for a couple of hours while Ryan takes in the sights and sounds of the infant room. This will hopefully help with the transition once he starts going there for full days. He has two more discovery days next week which will be half days, and without either one of us there. I hope he transitions easily and enjoys the interaction with other people.

Oh and P.S....

2009-01-14T20:39:00.003-06:00

I know that some of you have had trouble leaving comments on the blog. We had inadvertently blocked everyone who didn't have a blog set up through this blogger site. It should work now, so comment away if you wish!

Getting stronger

2009-01-14T19:34:00.006-06:00

Ryan has been getting a ton of tummy time lately! We took him to the doctor on Monday because we noticed that he was getting a small but noticeable flat spot on the back of his head. The combination of him being such an awesome sleeper and our lack of committment to tummy time is what contributed to it. I know that babies with extremely flat heads have to wear a helmet 23 hours a day for 8-12 months and we really wanted to nip this in the bud to avoid that. Dr. Murphy said it was nothing to worry about but we do need to be more diligent about tummy time and doing other activities where Ry will not be flat on his back, except for sleeping of course. Even the swing and bouncy chair need to be limited to 20 minutes at a time, only once or twice a day. Now that Keith is home with Ryan he is getting quite creative! Ryan has gotten so much better about tummy time, and loves to be propped over his boppy like in this photo. Okay, "loves" is a stretch, but he doesn't mind it and will happily look in the mirror or at a toy in front of him for longer stretches every day. Keith has also been propping him in a sitting position and I can tell already that his core is getting much stronger. I am glad that we noticed the flat spot because it is forcing us to do what we should have been doing in the first place.

Last weekend was Ryan's baptism and a visit from Grandma and Grandpa Brown. Here are some photos of them hanging out with Ryan. Grandma couldn't get enough of him and was so delighted to see how much weight he had gained. Ryan seemed to know that she was his Grandma~ you could tell he was very comfortable in her arms and gave her smiles right away. I'm sure that felt good since she doesn't get to see him very often! He will always be happy to see his Grandma and Grandpa Brown from Colorado because they love him so much and especially love to spoil him!!

The baptism could have gone much better! Ryan looked like an absolute doll...and of course I didn't think to take any good photos of him beforehand. All I have is this one of him in the carseat (he didn't wear that hat for more than a minute. I thought it looked kind of cute but a little pilgrim-ish???). Ryan was an angel throughout mass and fell asleep at the end. The plan was to give him a bottle between mass and the baptism, but he seemed so happy and content that it kind of slipped my mind as I was socializing with everyone. The baptism started and there were 3 other babies in addition to Ry. A few minutes into it he started fidgeting and fussing, so I offered to take him from his Godmother, Teri. (By the way, I am not the kind of person to instantly grab my baby from someone when he makes the slightest fuss, but I also know that most people don't want to hold your crying baby and I don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable). Then came the all out cry. Time for a bottle!! I stepped to the side and gave him his bottle. All the while I was thinking about what a stupid mistake that was. I knew he would be hungry and I know how he gets when his bottle is overdue! I was really embarrassed, not that Ryan was hungry or crying but that I didn't remember to feed the poor child! I was imagining all of the other mothers thinking, "why didn't she just feed him beforehand????" and I felt like such an amateur (which I am!!). But what's almost worse is that even after the bottle and his LOUD burp, both of which happened during this religious ceremony, he still cried and fussed! I could not soothe him! I could then imagine all of the other mothers thinking, "she can't even calm her own baby!!" and feelings of inadequacy mounted! Granted, I wasn't on my A game anymore~ I was exasperated~and I'm sure that played into it. My mom reassured me by telling me that the only thing the other mothers were thinking is that they were glad that THEIR babies weren't crying! Ryan basically cried for the rest of the ceremony. He did okay when he was up at the baptismal fountain but proceeded to cry again afterwards. Now I know I am a good mom and I love my son very much. If I fall short of anything it certainly isn't for lack of trying! I know that I am not perfect but I also know that I can soothe my baby. It was just an off time, and not for Ryan but for me! I will surely not make those mistakes again! Well, anyway, as a result we did not get many good photos to share.

At the next "dress up" event, I am going to take photos beforehand! When we got home from church Ryan went straight down for a nap and slept through most of his party. We both could have really used a nap!

2009-01-10T14:51:00.003-06:00

Here's the video of Ryan laughing out loud. Great stuff!!

Mr. Mom

2009-01-07T20:10:00.006-06:00

I am back at work and it is going surprisingly well. It is good to be back at a familiar place doing something that I enjoy. One of my coworkers blew up some photos of Ryan and hung them above my desk. I love to go into the office and see them there. It makes me so happy and puts things into perspective as I go about my day. It is a busy time at the store but I am able to work reasonable hours because I have the support for the time being. I don't know how long that will last but I am going to enjoy it for now!!

Keith is Mr. Mom right now and it gives me such peace of mind to know that my boys are at home together. Since Keith works from home, he was around enough when I was on leave to see what the daytime routine is and he is continuing it beautifully. I can tell they are having such fun during the day because Keith is documenting it with photos and videos. He captured a video today that is hilarious. Ryan is laughing out loud (way loud), just cracking up at Daddy talking to him. Although it breaks my heart just a little that I wasn't there for the giggle fest, it makes me happy to know that Ryan is in the best hands. Day care will be an adjustment for all of us when the time comes, but I am sure we will find our peace with it.

From the second I get home to the second Ryan goes to bed I am with him. It's only a couple of hours if that, so I have to make each minute count. For the past 2 days, he has been ready for a cat nap when I've returned home, so we go into his room and I hold him for a 45 minute nap. We sit on the glider in the dark and it is a great way for me to unwind from work while we are both relaxing. Normally I would not hold him for a nap like that, but since it is my only time with him during the day, it is a luxury for both of us! And a real treat last night was that Ryan slept through the night! 12 hours, awake only twice for reswaddling but right back to sleep and no feeding! Only time will tell if it was a fluke or not!

I am off Friday-Sunday and I am looking forward to some quality time with my baby! Grandma and Grandpa Brown will be in this weekend for Ryan's baptism so it will be a full but fun three days. He has the cutest little white christening outfit so there is sure to be photos in the near future!

Reckoning

2009-01-04T09:09:00.005-06:00

Well, tomorrow is D-Day. The bubble that we have been living in is about to pop. I think I am as ready as I can be to go back to work. More than anything, I am already getting nostalgic about the first 3 months of Ryan's life. It flew by! And as much as we have a ton to look forward to as Ryan learns and grows, I will never get those first 3 months back. They were the best of times and the worst of times filled with highs and lows.

First of all, I am still sometimes in awe that I carried a baby for 9 months and gave birth. I am so grateful for the experience and feel so lucky to have had a healthy little boy. Coming home from the hospital and the newness of everything was quite an adjustment. We were clueless! And tired! We wanted the nurses from the hospital there with us 24/7 telling us what to do. Sleep deprivation can challenge even the strongest of relationships. The first month was hard, I won't try to sugar coat it. There is nothing that can prepare you for parenthood...nothing. But along with the challenges of it all there was also great joy. Staring at Ryan for hours as he slept was true contentment. Getting to know him and his little personality, wondering what the future might hold for him, being there for him at every cry or whimper...that is what I love about being a mom.

As time goes on, things continue to get easier. Ryan is good natured and a champion of sleep. There are always challenges, but as we get to know him we are better able to provide him with what he needs. The biggest lightbulb moment for me was discovering his tired- and overtired cues. For the longest time we wondered why Ry would get so agitated and fussy every couple of hours. We chalked it up to gas, especially since he had all of those digestive issues at 4 weeks. As I was reading up on infant sleep I realized he was just plain tired!!! We had to soothe him out of that cranky state and into la la land. And now I am a self proclaimed sleep nazi. I will take that title any day if it means long naps and a baby that sleeps 10 hour stretches at night! Once Keith and I started getting better sleep everything seemed much rosier.

Seeing Ryan smile (legitimately) for the first time was pure glee! My all time favorite time of day is when I go to his crib in the morning and he is all smiles. The ones where he opens his mouth, smiles and coos because he is so happy to see you. He also really likes to be on his changing table. Not necessarily being changed, but laying on the table interacting with us. He smiles and babbles, and when there is music on, will sing with us. Those are the moments that I live for! Watching him play, shake his rattle, stare at a block on his play gym, knowing that he is taking it all in and figuring things out...fills me up like nothing else can. And kissing those chubby cheeks, well I could do that all day. I want to continue giving him his nighttime bottle even though Keith has offered to do it as I go back to work. I love that time together. It is so peaceful and it is time that we will never get back once it is gone.

I feel ready to go back to work because I love routine. I am ready to see my friends at work and get back to my job, even though my priorities are much different now. I have to get ready to let go a little...Ryan may not always eat when I would feed him, or sleep when I would have put him down for a nap. It won't be easy to relinquish the control but it will be good for me~ and for him. We can't live in a bubble forever! I can only hope that this will make Ryan a more flexible and well adjusted child.

I will forever look back at this time off with nostalgia. To date, becoming a parent has been the most difficult yet rewarding job I have ever had. My relationship with Keith has grown by leaps and bounds and I wouldn't want to share this journey with anyone else on the planet. He is an amazing father! So I know with this next transition I will be okay. I have my boys, we are a family, and we will all be okay. The journey continues....

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T12:15:00.002-06:00

Well, it's noon on New Year's Day and Keith and I have already rid the house of anything holiday! Usually I am so reluctant to take the Christmas decorations down and like to keep the tree up as long as possible, but this year I am excited to start out the new year clean and fresh. Since I start back at work on Monday (yikes!!) I want the house to be in order so that I will feel ready to embark on this next transition.

Last night we went over to our next door neighbor's to ring in the new year. They have a darling little 2 year old girl, Reese, who was celebrating her birthday and we had a lot of fun. We brought Ryan's bassinet and put him down around 7:00. He still fits in that bassinet and really loves it; I think he feels so nice and cozy when he is in it. We didn't hear from him until 12:30 (we surprised even ourselves for staying up and OUT that late!). He was fussing in his sleep b/c he had broken out of his swaddle. I re-swaddled him and he stayed asleep but we thought he would need his bottle soon so we walked home and waited for him to wake. Good thing we just decided to go to bed b/c he did not wake up until 4am!!! Keith was an angel and got up with him to feed him....we were both hurting a little from a few new year's drinks (the beauty of celebrating next door!). Ry went back to bed after that and stayed down until 7:30. What a nice new year's gift for us! :) He really does seem to like his sleep and I am trying to enjoy this while it lasts because I know that he is still not old enough to fall into any kind of pattern.

So...back to work in less than a week. The good news is that Keith will be home with Ryan for the next 3 weeks. And while I still have some details to work out, I am able to go down to 4 days per week so I will still be able to be home with Ry one day during the week too. My mom will watch him one day, which leaves him in day care 3 days per week max which I feel okay about. Ideally, it would only be 2 days and I am trying to work that out. I have a lot of feelings attached to going back to work and putting our boy in day care, some positive and some negative, but the show must go on. The rational part of me knows that going back to work is the right thing to do. That doesn't mean that it will be easy and I know there will be some stumbling blocks along the way. But such is life! The most important thing to me right now is working out my schedule to fit what is best for Ryan.

First Christmas

2008-12-26T11:39:00.000-06:00

We had a very nice Christmas for Ryan's first. We spent Christmas Eve at Uncle Jer and Aunt Teri's, and Christmas Day here. Ryan was a bit cranky yesterday so he slept for much of Christmas afternoon and strategically planned a nice long nap while we ate dinner.

We missed Grandma and Grandpa Brown on Christmas. They ended up staying in Colorado for the holiday because Grandma B. had a cold. Hopefully they will be able to come out in January for Ryan's baptism. They will not believe how big he has gotten!

Here is Grandma Dhein holding Ry, her favorite Christmas gift.

Tummy Time

2008-12-21T11:37:00.001-06:00

Does this give you an idea of how Ryan feels about tummy time??!

Obsession

2008-12-21T11:07:00.000-06:00

I have a new addiction!!! On Friday Keith and I signed on to Facebook in order to see photos of our friend's new baby. (Congrats Brian and Trista! Jackson Gilbert Caldwell...) I am obsessed! Over the past couple of days I have logged on too many times to see if I have any messages and to see if anyone has posted anything. It is quite an addiction. Although I don't want to speak for Keith, I think he is hooked too. This morning when I went to log on I felt sort of ashamed that I was getting on AGAIN...only to find out that Keith had already logged on and posted something!!! Maybe Ryan needs his own page....(KIDDING!)

On a proud front, I am happy to say that Ryan started sleeping in his big crib a week ago and it has been going wonderfully. He sleeps great in it, thank goodness, and trust me, we don't take that for granted! He is still getting up once per night which is just fine. Last night he went down at 7:20pm, woke at 1am for a bottle and then slept until 7:15am. Once we put him down for the night we don't hear from him unless he has broken free from his swaddle or it is time for his bottle. It is nice to have him in his crib. I thought it would be a more difficult transition for me but he is right next door and now we can lay in bed and watch TV at night instead of tiptoeing around our room. We are still working on naps. They are inconsistent which is normal at this age. I read that naps aren't routine until at least 3 months, and our pediatrician even said it could be up to 6 months. So when he is tired we put him down and usually he will sleep for at least 45 minutes, sometimes even close to 3 hours! If he takes a long morning nap like he did yesterday, the afternoons tend to be more difficult nap-wise. He will only dabble with them, like 30 minutes here and there. Then he turns a bit cranky! Last night it turned out okay, because we just put him to bed earlier and he went down easily. He was ready!

It is freezing in Chicago today; I think it is 0 degrees! I think we will hang out by the fire and get the house ready for Keith's parents, who arrive on Tuesday, and Christmas. I am excited about Christmas, but also getting hit with reality. Two weeks from tomorrow I have to go back to work and Christmas is just a reminder of that. I know I should be living in the present and not in the future, but I am going to miss Ryan tremendously during the day. I am pretty sure I will be able to go down to working 4 days per week which will help. I can't believe this phase is coming to a close! It goes by so fast.....

Mini Me!

2008-12-18T16:43:00.001-06:00

Ry's expression is priceless. It is 100% Daddy's!

Twice as Fun

2008-12-18T10:08:00.001-06:00

Yesterday Ryan and I went over to the St. Cyr's house to see their new twin girls, Kami and Lainey. The girls are absolutely beautiful and we had such fun! I love how we call these "play dates". Clearly the babies are pretty oblivious! (But way cute nonetheless).

Darcie and Adam tried to have a baby for many years before they turned to adoption. They were cautiously optimistic when they heard they had been chosen by a birth mom in Portland who was due in mid December. They were in shock when they got a call in mid November that the mother was in labor and that they should get on the next plane to Portland to be there!

Last spring they were chosen by a birth mother here in Illinois who was pregnant with a boy. They made all of the preparations, decorated the nursery and met the birth parents, only to have it fall through at the last minute. It was so heartbreaking for them and we all struggled to understand why such an amazing couple was being denied the role of parents.

Now that they have their girls it all makes sense. It was the "plan" all along! It is just another example of how prayers do get answered, but not always the way that we think. And sometimes the answer can exceed our expectations well beyond anything we could have ever imagined!

Seeing Darcie and Adam with the girls was so much fun. They are such naturals, and Darcie, who is the most organized person I have ever met, really seems to have it down. The bottles are lined up in the kitchen, ready to go, and she can even feed the girls at the same time! I am so happy for them. It seems like just yesterday that Darcie and I were sitting in the design office at Crate complaining about how badly we both wanted children! How quickly things can change!

Cuteness!

2008-12-16T18:01:00.000-06:00

Here is a picture of our tired little guy, who actually fell asleep as I was swaddling him! He is wearing one of my favorite sleepers- it is covered in little monkeys.

Yesterday he responded just fine to his vaccinations. No fever or other reactions, just a very lethargic boy! He was so cuddly, and very open to napping all day in the crib! At the doctor he weighed in at 11 lbs 9oz (50th percentile) and measured 24 inches in length (85th percentile). We have one long and lean little guy.

I am also adding this pic of me holding Ry in the sling. I used it as I was preparing his bottle and it really relaxed him, so I decided to keep him in it as I fed him. Keith called it lazy...I call it quite clever!!!!

Couldn't Resist

2008-12-14T13:09:00.000-06:00

some cute bath time pics!

Weekend Fun

2008-12-14T12:29:00.001-06:00

Ryan had so much fun on Saturday with his "cousins" Brady, JT and Madeline. The kids are so into him- playing with him and caring for him- and Ryan does love the attention! He was full of smiles and coos for them too. In the morning we went to JT and Madeline's basketball game at the YMCA. They play on the kindergarten team at St. Joe's (where their mom, Sarah, and I went to grade school! We are so old! :) Then we went back to the Schallmoser's for some lunch and Wii playing. The Wii is so much fun; I think I might cave in and agree to getting one (of course Keith wants it) because it is not like the video games that we grew up with where you just sit in front of the TV and zone for hours at a time. Anyway, it was a great day and once Ryan is older he is going to love running around with the Schallmoser kids. I am sure he will look up to them and think they are way cool. We joke that someday Brady (who is 20 months) and Ryan are going to beg Madeline (6 yrs old) to buy them beer just like we did with our older siblings (just kidding mom and dad!). Oh, I am sure there will be stories....

Ry is 2 months old now and tomorrow he has his 2 month check up. He is going to have some vaccinations which we are not looking forward to. We hope he reacts okay to them and they don't turn him too sideways. He is holding his head up really well now and I must admit I am glad he is getting stronger and not such a fragile newborn anymore. He is cooing a lot and getting more interactive and each day is more and more fun with him. I want to eat him up! It is amazing watching him look around and absorb his surroundings as he learns and grows. Lately he has been trying to "find" his thumb; you can tell is is figuring out how to put his hand to his mouth in a controlled way so that he can get it! And his 3 month clothing that I have been waiting to try on him because they looked so big fit him now. Not only do they fit him; much of it will be outgrown in a matter of a week or two!

2008-12-08T12:09:00.000-06:00

Since I am not working right now I never know what the date is. I looked at the calendar today and couldn't believe that it is already December 8th!! Where does the time go?! I really should be Christmas shopping right now but I keep putting it off. My family and I decided that we would keep this holiday season lighter than usual for obvious reasons. We are all OK with it. It takes pressure off of everyone. And as my Dad so perfectly put it, "Christmas is all about miracles, and ours came a little early this year." So true!! Here is a photo of my Dad with Ryan. Keith's parents will be in from Colorado for a few days over Christmas so everyone will be together, which will be really nice.

Right now Ryan is sleeping in his crib. I am watching him on the video monitor waiting for him to wake up. On Friday night he slept from 9:15pm to 5:15am!! It turned out to be a bit of a fluke since he is now back to his 9ish to 3 or 4ish in the morning which I am definitely not complaining about! Besides, the morning he slept until 5:15 he didn't go back to sleep, and the mornings he wakes at 3 or 4 he goes back down until 7 or so. The more I talk to new moms, the more I realize what a dream sleeper Ryan is. We still haven't attempted his crib at night, but he is napping in it during the day and is going down very easily now. Yesterday afternoon he had been asleep for 2 hours and I started trying to slowly wake him so that his feeding schedule wouldn't get too off kilter. They say never wake a sleeping baby, so I was trying to be gentle and make him think he was waking on his own!!! I un-swaddled him, turned the hall light on, started putting his laundry away, and he would not wake up!! So I let him be for a while longer, thinking about how much he must have needed that sleep. I guess we don't need to tiptoe around anymore when he is sleeping! I don't think a fire engine would have woken him at that point. Well anyway, he finally did wake, got his bottle, and proceeded to sleep the afternoon away as he got passed around during the Broncos game.

Grandma is going to babysit today while I go to the dentist. I am trying to fit in all of these appointments while I am on leave so I don't have to take more time off of work when I finally do go back. Keith is going out of town Weds-Fri this week so I will be flying solo with the little man. I am not looking forward to it! I know I can handle it, especially since Ry is so good, but it is always nice knowing that someone else is there just in case.....

Well, I hear my little prince beckoning.....

The Napster

2008-12-02T18:02:00.001-06:00

Look at this bright eyed, happy boy!! I am very excited about this because after a rough morning of boycotting sleep, little man Ry slept for 3.5 hours this afternoon in his bassinet. I am trying to get him to nap in his big crib and he will only take cat naps. My mom said that I was a big cat napper in my day...and you know what they say about payback! So I put the bassinet in his room and he took a monster nap today. At least he was in HIS room instead of ours! Baby steps..... Well anyway, he was in a great mood when he woke up which makes me very committed to long, uninterrupted naps!

The other picture is of Keith reading his golf magazine to Ryan. He seems to like it!!!!

And thank you to Louise Leonard who gave us this cute outfit before Ryan was born. "Prince" is right!!!!!

So Much

2008-11-29T11:44:00.001-06:00

...to be thankful for!!! We had a great Thanksgiving day at my Mom's with my parents and Jer and Ter. It has been a fabulous holiday week and I am trying to take in every moment and appreciate that I don't have to work during this busy season.

We had visits from Aunt Terese and Uncle Duke, and Ryan loved getting all of the extra attention!

On Friday, Keith put Ryan's CU Tshirt on to watch the CU play Nebraska. Aren't they cute in matching Tshirts??? Unfortunately CU lost :(

And I think Charlie is interested in applying for a babysitting job!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

2008-11-24T16:49:00.000-06:00

Ryan will be 6 weeks old on Thanksgiving Day! So far he is a great sleeper. Many of the books I have read on sleep training for babies say that they can start sleeping through the night at 6 weeks. As it stands, Ry usually goes to sleep in his bassinet between 8 and 9 pm. He will wake up twice during the night for a bottle, and then around 7 am. Keith and I have been very happy with this~ I will take one night feeding and he will take the other. Last night Ryan only woke up for one feeding, which could be a complete fluke, but could also mean that he is moving towards the goal of sleeping through the night. Wouldn't that be awesome! I do think we have a ways to go before that happens, which is really fine. I mean, he isn't even 6 weeks old yet, and Keith and I are managing to get decent sleep as it is. I have been reading feverishly about different sleeping philosophies and learning a ton about sleep for babies. Over the past couple of days we have put Ryan down for naps in his big crib in order to get him comfortable with it. He really seems to like it and has no problem spending time there. He has yet to take a nap longer than an hour in it, but baby steps!!! Soon he will be too big for his bassinet and there will be no choice!

Ryan has been very smiley lately! It is so cute. Last night when he woke up I expected him to be a bear since he hadn't eaten in almost 6 hours. Instead he was completely calm and even smiled when I picked him up. Then after his bottle he just looked at me and smiled for what seemed like minutes. We were just sitting on the glider, by the glow of his little night light, smiling at eachother like we were sharing a really good secret. It is one of the best Mommy moments that I have had so far. I guess you never know when these moments are going to pop up!

Our Little Ham

2008-11-18T15:04:00.001-06:00

Ryan was servin' up some smiles this afternoon!

Happy Days Are Here Again!

2008-11-16T11:47:00.001-06:00

Here is Ryan in the snuggle that Grandma Donna hand made for him. It has the softest flannel jungle print lining and organic cotton outside. Doesn't he look comfy??? Grandma Donna certainly has the touch when it comes to comforting Ry. When she is holding him all he does is soundly sleep...and always for a stretch of several hours. He definitely does not do that with Mommy or Daddy anymore! When he does fuss, she whisks him away and he is instantly happy. She has already filled his head with visions of sugar plums when she talks to him about how wonderful his first Christmas is going to be!

Curveball

2008-11-14T09:55:00.003-06:00

Life threw us a major curveball over the last couple of days! When we left for the hospital on Wednesday morning for the barium swallow, we had no idea that Ryan would be having surgery later that afternoon. It was such a crazy day with all kinds of twists and turns. In the end everything worked out for the very best, but I must admit that it was a very stressful 24-48 hours. Here's how it unfolded....
Wednesday morning we took Ry in for his barium swallow. He drank down the barium and they x-rayed his stomach to see what was going on. The radiologist confirmed that there was acid reflux, and said that Ryan's pyloris, the valve that connects his stomach with his small intestine, seemed quite narrow. Our pediatrician had told us that pyloric stenosis was a possible diagnosis for Ryan's condition at our last appointment, but thought it wasn't all that likely. Pyloric stenosis is when that valve is too narrow for food to pass from the stomach to the small intestine. Since it can't really be digested, food stays in the stomach and eventually gets regurgitated.
Based on what the radiologist said, Dr. Murphy ordered an ultrasound and sent us to a different hospital that would be able to do it (apparently the hospital we were at couldn't). As a sidenote, Ryan threw up twice after his xray....lots of chalky barium everywhere! We were so desperate for a diagnosis! We wanted our boy to be well!
So we go to the ultrasound, and the doctors discover that Ryan's pyloris is on the threshold for what would be considered pyloric stenosis. Dr. Murphy sends us to a third hospital to meet with Dr. Liu, the pediatric GI specialist in the area, for a consultation. Keith and I are feeling extremely stressed, but also hopeful for a diagnosis and plan to get Ryan better. What we know at this point is that pyloric stenosis is somewhat common, curable by laparoscopic surgery that is usually performed within days of diagnosis, starts to appear at about 3 weeks of age, and most likely to occur in caucasion firstborn males. We also know that Ryan has almost all of the symptoms.
When we get to Edward hospital, they admitted us right away and got Ryan on an iv (one of the saddest things I have ever seen...my 4 week old son getting an iv). Dr. Liu met with us and told us he recommended surgery that afternoon. He told us that the surgery takes less than an hour, that he would go in with a scope through Ry's belly button and cut the pyloris to allow food to pass through. And that he would be eating within hours! While we were worried about our month old boy having surgery and going under anesthesia, we so badly wanted him to be able to eat!
Ryan had surgery Wednesday night and it was very successful. He is eating again and we are so relieved! We spent the night at the hospital Wednesday and he was discharged Thursday evening. What a brave little trooper he is! It was so hard for us to see him in pain, attached to his iv and recovering from surgery. We are now home and Ry is doing great. He is eating really well, has a great appetite, doesn't appear to be in much if any pain, and most importantly, keeping his food down! He does, however, fuss whenever he is put down...I think he has already learned that Mommy and Daddy are suckers! So we are holding and loving him like crazy.
The biggest piece of advice that Keith and I got before Ryan was born was to trust our instincts. We knew there was something wrong with him even though everyone, with the best of intentions, told us not to worry and that spitting up was normal for babies. We are first time parents and hardly experts, but we just knew that Ryan's symptoms were not normal. So we will continue to try to listen to that inner voice, even though it may not always point us in the right direction and may sometimes make us look like the most paranoid parents ever.
In addition, we are so thankful that Ryan's condition wasn't chronic or life threatening. Yes, surgery (especially on a month old baby) is major, but thankfully there was a cure and we can now move on. I absolutely love our pediatrician, Dr. Patricia Murphy, for taking action and getting us answers so quickly.
Thank you everyone for all of your support and concern for our boy! We are looking forward to getting back to "normal", whatever that is!

Spit Happens

2008-11-11T11:20:00.000-06:00

Another week in Ryan's life and a new set of unique challenges! While Ryan was doing so well with his weight gain, there was a new issue brewing. Turns out he is a big time spitter! During the first two weeks of his life he did not spit up at all. In the back of my head I was thinking that he would be one of those babies that just never really spit up. Last week he really proved me wrong! After a bottle he spit up what seemed like the entire contents of the feeding (and then some!). We didn't think a whole lot of it, just changed his clothes and went on with the day. then it happened again a few hours later. I'm not talking about a little bit of spit either...I know that that is normal. I'm talking the entire contents of his bottle. I thought there might be something in my milk that didn't agree with him, or perhaps we didn't sanitize his bottle well enough and he got some kind of bug. I was afraid to feed him for fear of it happening again! We moved on and wondered if it would. It did- once the next day, once the next, etc. In addition to the spitting up he had a lot of gagging and hiccups at various times throughout the day. We called the pediatrician, and she said as long as he continued to have dirty diapers we should feel comfortable about him getting enough nutrition. So we continued on, suspecting acid reflux and being very careful with each feeding to ensure that it would stay down (stressful!). Some did, some didn't, and we started to seriously question if Ryan was gaining any weight at all with all of this nourishment escaping him on such a regular basis. So we scheduled a weight check for yesterday and it turned out that he only gained 2 ounces in one week (the goal for a baby this age is an ounce per day). We were crushed to say the least. We have been so diligent about his feeding schedule in hopes that his weight would be on track. He is not fussy, thank goodness, but I imagine he is in some discomfort with all of the gagging and spitting. He seems to be doing well otherwise, alert when he should be and still sleeping like a champ. What a little trooper he is. We are baffled! Dr. Murphy ordered a barium swallow at at the hospital for tomorrow to verify that it is acid reflux and to see if there is anything else wrong with Ryan's digestive system. Then we will go from there.
As of today, he has already had his major episode (and hopefully only). He does much better when we hold him for at least an hour after a feeding, so that is where most of our time is going these days. Right now it is 2:15 and I am finally going to take a shower! That is with Keith off today and helping out!
There is medication that babies can take to help with reflux and there is also special formula that we can give him to help. We will see! As parents, Keith and I feel so helpless and sad to see our boy struggling in any way. Please say a prayer for Ry that the reflux will resolve itself and he will continue to grow and thrive!

Ryan Wanna-Be!

2008-11-07T10:25:00.000-06:00

Daddy and Me

2008-11-06T11:16:00.000-06:00

They say "nap when the baby naps".....and Keith has really taken it to heart!!!!!!!!!!!!

So Big!

2008-11-03T20:33:00.000-06:00

Our little sprout is getting big!! We went to the doctor today and Ryan gained one pound in one week!! Keith and I were very diligent about Ryan's feeding schedule and making sure that he got the nutrition he needed each day in order to gain an ounce per day over the past week as prescribed by our pediatrician. Well, our little chub gained 7 ounces and then some!! So we can let up a little on the feeding schedule knowing that he weighed in today at 8 lbs 12 ounces (his birth weight was 8lb 4oz). I can already tell that he is changing and I want to make time stand still! He has definitely gotten longer and I can see his face filling out. He can lift his head up when he is laying on your shoulder! I know that things will only get more exciting as he gets older, but I don't want my newborn baby to slip away! Every parent that has held Ryan, even the ones that still have babies, have all said how you forget how small they are when they are first born. It goes by way too fast!!

His umbilical cord stump fell off last night so now we can give him real (not sponge)baths!!

As far as any kind of nighttime routine goes, I think we have fallen into one. We feed Ryan every night around 9pm, then about every 3 hours after that. Since I am not breastfeeding, just pumping breastmilk, Ryan always gets a bottle of either milk or formula. The nice thing about it is that Keith can help with nighttime feedings! That is such a luxury, as it affords both of us the chance to sleep for a stretch of time at night. We are usually up around 6am for a bottle and for me to pump, then we all go back to sleep until about 8:30 am. Ryan sleeps very well in between feedings, so I would say on average Keith and I are sleeping 6-7 hours per night which is great for parents of a newborn!

Keith goes back to work a week from today which will be sad for our little family and our routine! We are so lucky that he had this much time off of work. We have been living in this little bubble for the past few weeks and it has been so much fun. We just move at our own pace, we generally don't have too much going on, just hanging out at home and looking after Ryan. We aren't on any schedule, and best of all, between my Mom and Teri, we haven't had to cook a meal yet! They have been so awesome about preparing meals for us and it is all about to come to an abrupt ending!! Reality is going to come quickly! I am trying to enjoy this time and take it all in. I have to return to work on January 5th- a topic that I am currently blocking out in my mind.